Wednesday, 3 June 2015

No.213 : Weekender

Weekender at the IMDb

Bangin’ man - let’s have a look at this modern classic and see if it earns the whole one star that Netflix viewers have deemed it worthy of.

It’s the early 90’s and the kids are being hassled by the man. Their dreadful music can only be found on pirate radio and they have to dance in warehouses. Now I was about in the 90’s and I can clearly remember fully equipped discothèques being available and Bruno Brookes doing the Top 40 on Radio 1.

Anyway, our hero Matt thinks he can do better and with the help of his simpleton friend they track down the pirate DJ and set up their own rave in an abandoned warehouse. It is an unqualified success and Matt decides to quit when he’s ahead until he discovers all the takings are counterfeit cash. He then decides to do it again and again - can’t fault logic like that!

They start to feel the heat after those killjoys in parliament speak out against the illegal raves due to all the drugs and safety concerns - the fools! The ‘Dibble’ (the police) show up and are somehow sent away when told the rave is a private party albeit one with a voluntary entrance fee. ‘I'll be back’ says the copper before never being seen again.

With the police concerns dealt with the guys then hook up with a nice promoter from London who teams up with them for some ‘super raves’. Alas they also meet the baddies who want to take their cash and take over their raves - the swine - this is our lawbreaking activity!

As the pressure mounts schisms start to appear in the group over who had sex with who and whether it’s worth the bother any more. As the bad guys turn the screws the scene is set for some limp action in Amsterdam to see which unworthy scroat makes it out alive.

This is a really dreadful offering with nothing to recommend it apart from the ironic finger pointing at how really terrible it is. To start with you have no characters worthy of the name. They are a bunch of scuzzy drug dealers led by Donovan off ‘The Inbetweeners’ and you have no empathy for them at all. I think you are meant to see them as hero pioneers but they just come across as a bunch of dope head scofflaws.

The era is hardly evoked in the memory with an ‘Italia 90’ t-shirt the only nod towards a period setting. They also show up how insignificant the whole enterprise is when the spinning newspapers (a new innovation!) are clearly mock ups rather than the real headlines which, in truth, probably didn't exist anyway.

The short running time is padded with a few long scenes of punters dancing away and I suspect one would need a truckload of ecstasy to be drawn into these mood setting rave-ups.

The acting is uniformly awful with a lot of ‘Did you shag my bird’ exchanges cringe worthy to the extreme. The guy playing Matt seemed genuinely dense so if this was acting kudos to you sir!

Over the piece I think a morality tale was the ambition with perhaps a side of nostalgia and bravado thrown in for good measure. What was realised was a bunch of tits in shell suits jumping about and playing at being gangsters. Risible rubbish!

‘W’ Rating 5/23

Best Bit - I suppose the poolside scenes in Ibiza win by a couple of points.

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